NARCISSISM AS IT PERTAINS TO MEDIATION MANCHESTER

People frequently mention during their MIAM assessment appointment that they have been cautioned against attempting Mediation Manchester since their ex-spouse was labelled as a “narcissist” in a previous conversation. Narcissism has emerged as something of a buzzword in recent years, but it is not something that the average person can detect in other people.

When it comes to the process of divorce, however, dealing with a former spouse who appears to be “narcissistic” may be incredibly difficult, and this can also be true during the Mediation Manchester phase of the divorce. Many people believe that going to court is the only choice they have in these kinds of situations; yet, the adversarial structure of the legal system can play into the narcissistic need to ‘win’ at any cost. At the MIAM assessment, it is the role of the mediator to signpost the less well-known routes to a settlement. These can frequently allow the ‘narcissistic’ partner to feel that they have ‘won,’ while the other partner gains the freedom from the emotional rollercoaster that they tend to value more than anything else. In situations like these, The Family Mediation Manchester Trust frequently recommends hybrid mediation to our clients.

Hybrid Mediation:

The ability of the mediator to keep certain confidences is one of the ways in which this approach differs from more conventional forms of Mediation Manchester . The mediator will be able to learn what is essential to each client and what they are willing to compromise on if they are allowed to discuss their desired outcome and what they are willing to give up with him or her. For instance, if a victim is content with an agreement that is at the bottom of the bracket that a judge would order and believes that as long as it sits within the bracket, they would prefer to have their life back and to move on, the mediator can hold this information while establishing what the ‘narcissistic’ partner is looking for in order to feel that they have won the dispute. In this scenario, the victim may feel that as long as it sits within the bracket, they would rather have their life back If the narcissistic partner thinks that they have prevailed in the breakup of the family, there may be fewer negative effects on the children of the family. This can have a significant impact on the children’s health, not just for the duration of their childhood but even into their adulthood as well. At hybrid mediation, each party has the option of having their attorney available to help them throughout the mediation process. This can take place either in the mediation conference itself, in a Zoom breakout room, or over the phone. This might seem comforting and reassuring to persons who are working through the process of recovering from the narcissistic abuse of a previous spouse.

When dealing with a narcissistic partner, Mediation Manchester may not be able to resolve some or all of the issues; in this case, it is often helpful to consider other methods such as neutral evaluation or arbitration; this is especially true if the parties have been able to narrow the issues in the course of mediation.

Neutral Evaluation:

Utilizing this at the beginning of a case, with a qualified arbitrator or counsel, can cost anywhere from £1,500 to $2,000, but it may be money well spent if there is a sticky legal point that needs to be evaluated and where neutral advice would generate sufficient information to put an issue to bed. Given the novelty of these new methods of conflict resolution, the ‘narcissistic’ spouse may frequently be drawn to these procedures and the associated suggestion that being an early adopter in some way makes a person’special.’

Arbitration:

When trying to resolve a dispute through mediation fails, it may be in the best interest of the client to suggest that they participate in arbitration instead so that the amount of time spent in court can be reduced. It is possible for this to be a more controlled procedure than going to court, particularly if the problems in question have been narrowed down via Mediation Manchester .

There is, of course, the option of traditional mediation, in which both parties are present at meetings; this can be done so long as the mediator believes they can maintain control over the process. However, the obligation to relay everything that was said in shuttle mediation can lead to problems because the narcissist may try to “gaslight” the mediator, just as may have been the case with the former partner. This is because the mediator is obligated to relay everything that was said in the Mediation Manchester session.

Our mediators at Family Mediation Service are, thankfully, well trained and well equipped to deal with narcissistic clients, and they will guide clients in the direction of the solutions that are most appropriate for the client’s particular set of circumstances.

Please contact us at the following phone,  03300100052, if you require any other information.

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